Perspective

The path that is my life
Stretches out before me
Going farther in the distance
Than my mind can fathom

Endless in its possibilities
Mysterious in its essence
Meeting the sky and Sun above
With great joy and deep love

Yet sometimes my vision is pulled
To the ground just below my feet
The pebbles, stones, holes, obstacles
That cause me to stumble, to fall

I forget the path before me
Its beauty and light
Its grace and purpose
Its soul-stirring wonder

And instead I stand frozen
Unmoving, angry, hurt, lost
Caught up in my own trap
Not seeing the path before me

But when I do remember
To look up, to see the bigger purpose
The paralysis is lifted
All the heaviness trickles away

And I stand ready

To walk
To learn
To stumble
And to grow

Searching for Signs of His Will

Lost in a sea of options
No confirmations yet in sight
An uneasy anxiety overcomes me
As a lonely child in the quiet of the night

My heart seeks answers
As a plant seeks the light
Looking for signs of His will
Praying to do what is right

The Gift of Childhood

Forever

Today, 03 June 2014, will be 5 years I have been blessed to serve here in Haifa, Israel. I wrote this song in March of 2010 after I had been here about 9 months and it is as true now as it was then.

Adele Dodds is playing the piano.



I wanted to pick one photo for each year to share with you.... But that was impossible.... Here's the best I could do :)

Five years in Haifa:

August 2009 - Shrine of Baha'u'llah

December 2009 - The Negev

March 2010 - The Seat of the Universal House of Justice

June 2010 - Ben Gurion Avenue (photo taken by Adib Roy)

June 2010 - Baha'u'llah's Prison Cell Window in Akka

June 2010 - Paths of Stone

December 2010 - Sunset on a Haifa beach during the Carmel Forest Fires

April 2011 - Bahji Visitor's Centre through the flowers

June 2011 - Monument of Bahiyyih Khanum

June 2011 - Pilgrimage

January 2012 - Staff Entrance to the Seat of the Universal House of Justice
I had the amazing bounty of serving in this building for over 4 years. 

May 2012 - Flowers on the Hillel Stairs
(I lived on these stairs for 4 years) 

June 2012 - Mazra'ih 

July 2012 - Archives Building and the Shrine of the Bab

November 2012 - A bird cloud and Haifa Bay

March 2013 - The Shrine of the Bab from a view point behind the Seat

May 2013 - The Shrine of Baha'u'llah on Ascension night

October 2013 - Bahji at sunset

March 2014 - The Shrine of the Bab

May 2014 - House of Abdu'llah Pasha in Akka

May 2014 - Bahji

May 2014 - Bahji

The Ripples of Existence

He stands by the rail

Staring out at the expanse of ocean

Contemplating the depth of humanity’s tale

The ripples we each set in motion

These temporary swells

That disappear into the vast calm sea

Are as the greetings and farewells

Of a moment with eternity

The water's ebb and flow

Forced aside by his journey's advance

Tell of distant shores where waves will show

The impact of their passage's dance 

For though we live for a moment's breath

And pass quietly through with no commotion

The effects we leave long after our death

Are a testament to our love and devotion

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Light and Shadows

Why do you weep?
In darkness alone. 
Silence your only friend
In a graveyard of stone. 

Why do you hide?
With these ghosts of bygone times 
And climb into the graves
Of self-inflicted crimes

Why do you yearn? 
For the dawn's first brilliant rays
Yet walk alone in blindness
In the clutches of night's maze

Why do you dream?
Of a life you hold at bay
Haunted by the choices
And scars you won't betray

If you look into the shadows
Tween the sun, the earth and moon
You'll find no respite from the wails
Of time's eternal tune

So learn to walk towards the light
Past the gates of endless fear
And you'll find hearts waiting for you
To invite them to draw near

A New Vision

A day is lost as the night is found
A safety left when new cries resound
Each journey must finish before a new one can start
Each life must end to meet the Beloved of its heart

With each lost hope and broken dream
With every anguished cry and silent scream
A path is illumined, a purpose one can glean
A new door opens,  a meaning can be seen

Every confused thought, every seeming rift
Every misfortune is a blessing and gift
We must learn to look deeper at the darknesses we face
And we will see that they are truly illumined by His grace

The Mystery of Time

Time slips by
Sand quietly falling
Breaths and memories
Lost to nature's calling

A day feels like a year
Yet a year feels like a day
Endless moment's of anguish
To time's wealth, fall pray

Lost in a single moment
Battered by a storm
In retrospect a gift
When finally you transform

The soother of most ills
A path to detachment and calm
In harmony with remembrance of God
Time is the greatest healing balm

A Legacy of Sacrifice

I walk in the footsteps of those come before me
And yet I pave my own path along the way
Following their example, I learn from their triumphs
Letting their dedication illumine each day
Their legacy stamped on each page of my story
Their service measured by each wave on the bay
A fleeting moment was their time on this mountain
Yet engraved in every pebble will their sacrifices stay

Temporal Reality

A sequence of dates, climb their way up a door frame

While the waves quietly ebb and flow

The breezes of fate, fan the bright Rays of His Flame

Telling a story all should know

The moon changes shape, and the stars blaze and dance

As the sand slowly falls

The mountains escape, leaving boundless expanse

Echoing memory’s calls

Graveyards of achievements, and lifetimes of goals

Seasons lost with every breath

The earth’s bereavement, and the despair of souls

Bring life to the brink of death

Sisters become mothers, and children learn to speak

As brief moments in life slip silently past

Night and day succeed each other, in a constant hide and seek

Would you be content if today was your last?

Pilgrimage Day 6: A Pilgrim's Journey

"Praise be to God that through His gracious bounty you were enabled to visit His exalted, His sacred and luminous Threshold, to refresh and perfume your nostrils with the sweet-scented fragrances of God diffused from these imperishable, holy Places. This wondrous gift calls for thanksgiving, and this heavenly bestowal warrants praise and glorification. And such praise is best expressed when one’s pilgrimage, one’s honour at attaining His holy Court and becoming the recipient of His favours and loving-kindness produce a profound effect and influence upon every aspect of one’s life, upon one’s bearing and demeanour, and one’s activities. There is no doubt that it will be so. " - Bahiyyih Khanum


Such a bounty this blessing
Such a wonder these days
Stepping away from the material
Our spirits set ablaze
The world beyond these hours
Seems naught but a distant haze
Guests of the Blessed Beauty
Our souls held by His gaze


The gates are opened wide
Only beauty greets our sight
His servants bow their heads in thanks
In the joy and devotion they delight
Without the presence of the pilgrims
These servants would be lost in night
For such purity, faith and unswerving devotion
Refresh and enable them to carry His light


Though these days are as fleeting
As a comet in the sky
They have the power to transform you
Your life spread out before your eyes
Like Badi, kindled in a single moment
His love so strong, for it he would die
If we take the same love from our own sacred meeting
We will assuredly fly

Transition

I’m lost in the dark of transition.
No stars to guide my way.
Knowing the light is just a few hours away.
I see the light of possibility dawning for me, if I can hold out just a few short months.
But there is no light between then and now.
No stars, no sun, no moon, nothing.
I know the sun is about to rise.
But that knowledge doesn’t help me live in the dark right now any more then the promise of wealth someday helps a poor man to feed his family in the present.
It’s nice to know, but I’m still lost in the dark, counting down the days until I will see light again.
As the days pass by, time moves slower and slower
Like a curve graph getting closer and closer to zero but never hitting it.
Will I ever hit zero, or will I continue to halve the distance but never actually reach it.
Will I be lost in the dark forever?
Even with a definitive date, the question of getting there is a big one.
How long will I wait?
Will the months feel like years?
Will the years feel like decades?
Will the decades feel like centuries?
Could three months literally take forever?

Death

My beauty is gone
My love alone
My feelings repressed
My hurt not shown

The joy has dispersed
The silence begins
The sadness ignored
The numbness wins

Everything lost
Nothing gained
Nothing heard
Everything drained

Alone in this world
Alone on this earth
No future in sight
No sense of worth

The death of a dream
The death of a place
The death of a future
The death of a face

Sand

Sand.
It layers everything.
My heart, my mind, my life.
They are all covered and entrenched in sand.
Sand governs my life.
Sometimes it falls so quickly, that I can’t see anything around me.
My eyes stop working, I become blind to everything but the falling of sand.
I lose sight of the world around me, lose sight of myself.
It falls, and falls until my body is stuck in a cocoon of sand.
A cocoon which suffocates me, forcing all the air out of my body.
Then it slows, leaving me unable to move, or do anything.
It falls so slowly, it makes me want to cry.
So slowly that I can see everything around me in more detail than I wish.
Every nuance, every dirty, dusty, pale, faded aspect of everything around and inside of me.
Everything is cruelly lain out in front of me.
Cruelly seen, but unable to be touched, to be changed.
It cuts me off from everything and everyone.
Leaving me alone, and silent.
I yearn to break out of this prison.
This jail made of sand.
I yearn for wings to fly away from this place.
To soar to some other place, where sand does not exist.
To someplace where life is fulfilling.
Where love can be felt.
Where survival isn’t a struggle.
Yet for the moment, I’m trapped.
Ensnared in this prison.
Enveloped in blindness.
Lost in the sand.



For people who know me and think this is about Tucson, its not. Its about time.

Death

Until its close it’s too far away
It’s unbelievable and unlikely, unknown and unthought-of
Like a rash on your skin, never seen what’s happening within
Only noticeable after the fact
Like a magicians disappearing act
A phone call, an email, a knock on the door
Your whole foundation, thrown to the floor
Life gains boundaries, beginning and end
Continuing quickly following this trend
Then you realize the thing you’ve found
That your life is just another sand grain on the ground.

Waiting

Too many decisions to make
Anymore and my heart will break
Waiting and longing but dreading the reply
Longing to discuss this agony but afraid to cry
What do I do if they say no?
My dreams dashed, where will I go
I can’t stand this ache in my heart
Wondering to where I will depart
Everything is put on hold
But waiting is making my blood turn cold
I’m so scared of the future it’s making me sick
If they say no, where will I pick
At the moment my deepest fear
Is that I won’t be allowed to escape next year
What will happen if I’m forced to stay here?
Freedom escaping when it came so near
I’m so afraid, I can’t even cry
Time is slipping away, and as yet no reply