'Abdu'l-Baha

Your light is the beacon which guides my way
Your example, the lens I look through each day
Your actions, a standard by which I judge my own
Your love, my constant companion as I've grown

You are my solace in times of sorrow
You are my reason for seeing tomorrow
You are my hope when all seems lost
You are my warmth in the winter's frost

Remembrance of You brings joy to my heart
A joy which nothing can force to depart
Your love is my light and Your deeds are my guide
And I know, in my heart, You will always reside

Sensing Spirituality

The shores of Your ocean

Can be tasted through Your word

Your voice of Truth

Can be understood, if heard

The fire of Your love

Can be felt if we reach

The essence of Your message

Will be seen when we teach

The purpose of this life

Is the fragrance of Your beauty

Striving to attain Your Presence

Is our most sacred duty

Jumping

My soul is screaming to jump

With no fear of hitting the ground

Trusting that I will be caught

My heart no longer earthly bound

But staring at the edge I’m struck

Terror seeps into my core

Drowning any objectivity

My mind and heart deeply at war

Frozen before I’ve even begun

The potential lain ahead

Leering and taunting me to jump

While suffocating me with dread

If I never jump I may never know

If I’ve found my answering call

But what if I jump with utter trust

And instead I only fall?

Putting it all Together

A source of strength and love
In the dark a guiding light
A picture of beauty and grace
A most beautiful and wondrous sight

A mystifying inner calm
That can quiet any weather
I wish you could see that
You already have it all together

The loyalty of your friends
Is a testament to you
Of the inner essence of who you are
The love you can't help but shine through

Your thirst for knowledge and understanding
And sincerity with no pretense
The indiscriminate kindness you share
And the wisdom you dispense

These are all pieces of the resplendent puzzle
That put together is who you are today
While the picture may change as your soul is honed
Your essence and beauty will forever stay

My True Friend

My eyes tear up just thinking of the day you will depart

          My true friend from the start,

          The one who sees my heart

It feels too soon to say good-bye, too soon to let you go

          The winds of time so quickly blow,

          Didn't we just say hello?

It feels like only yesterday we sat and talked for hours

          As our friendship’s lovely flowers,

          Bloomed with Godly showers

Didn't I just come to you with sadness on my face?

          And with a deep embrace,

          You filled me with His Grace

The bonds of love I feel for you are deeper than the ocean

          This wondrous emotion,

          An unswerving devotion

I already have a hole inside though you haven’t even left yet

          That date a silent, heavy threat,

          Of teary eyes and hearts upset

And yet I know deep in my heart that all I will ever have to do

          To feel God's love and be renewed,

          Is close my eyes and think of you

To my Tucson Sisters and Brothers

To my sisters and brothers

My fathers, my mothers

My neighbors, my cohorts

My friends, my supports

In a single horrifying and devastating action

Our foundation and our "world" has been tragically fractioned

Many are hurt and six loved ones are dead

By a senseless attack, which left pain in its stead

No longer a quiet city unknown

The nation is now viewing a disaster zone

With sadness and horror they share our vignette

But deep in their hearts they pray to forget

Yet we'll always remember our lost sisters and brothers

Our lost fathers and uncles, daughters and mothers

The sadness and heartache we felt in our core

When death and anguish came in our front door

Tore holes in our hearts and invaded our brains

Our actions, our emotions, wrapped up in chains

Lost for a time, in the anger and shock

Unable to work, our minds in a lock

But once we moved past that and thought of each other

The flame which ignited, no power could smother

A beautiful light, though frail at its start

Has grown brilliant and strong in each and every heart

So proud am I of my fellow neighbors and friends

Of the selflessness and care which each of you extends

The love you poured out to those hurt in our community

Is proof that nothing can extinguish the fire of unity

A New Year, A New World

This year with all my heart I pray
To share His love and grace each day
To serve with radiance and live with trust
In the pathway of His loved ones to be as dust

To soften their footsteps and conquer their fears
To lighten their burdens and wipe away their tears
To not be weighed down by my own selfish worries
To not be crushed by life's passing flurries

I pray for the strength to dedicate my time
To transforming my community and to my own endless climb
To bettering myself through service to others
And to seeing all people as my sisters and brothers

On this day when many promises are made
I pray for Your strength and beg for Your aide
To learn to be self-less and detached from all things
And to keep this promise and the light which it brings

Our time on this earth is fleeting and brief
Why waste it with worry, anger and grief?
If we care for each other and selflessly serve
I know we will find all the joy we deserve

Written for a contest on figment.com - http://figment.com/books/17536-A-New-Year-A-New-World

The True Self

On the wings of Your Faith, I fly
Soaring above it all, a tiny dot in a vast blue sky
Longing for reunion, aflame with Your love
Above all the pain, as Noah's white dove
Your presence quenches the blazing fire
A calm fills me, and I am lifted higher

With wind cradling my mortal wings, I soar
Joy enrapturing my essence, creeping down to my very core
Light shining through, a tiny vision caught
A realization, a newly formed thought
This bird in the sky, not the shadow below
Is the true form of "I", what sets me aglow

A Guide's Gift

The light shines off the marble
Creating a mystical glow
Elegant shadows blanket the stone
And the night air moves calm and slow

The doors are opened wide and inviting
People quietly gaze
With humility and wonder they greet their Beloved
Then walk in and their heart's set abaze

They back out with reverance, when their prayers are complete
lamps shining strong and bright
They turn to face the world once again
Taking with them a ray of His light

I watch them walk past, still in a trance
A piece of them left in His shrine
Their worry and anguish lain on the threshold
Moving forward by a power Divine

Whispered Longing

In my mind I see
The leaves change, the colors range
My heart starts beating, the season's greeting
The wind blows by, the mountains sigh
As rain lightly falls, purifying inflexible walls

In my heart I feel the glee
First sight of snow, sets my eyes aglow
Calm settles on the trees, anchored by the winter freeze
Lights reflected, peace perfected
Joy resounding, love abounding
As it settles in my soul, the beauty brings life and makes me whole

A Slowly Fading Friendship

Eyes plead for understanding
Hearts confused and broken
Demolition zones expanding
Troubled by words unspoken

Haunted by memories lost in debris
Not hearing what each has to say
Caring and kindness atrophy
At the ties of friendship's slow decay

Lost in a web, the source oblique
Every day a steeper slope
Unsure which road to seek
Empty of both joy and hope

A protective wall is quietly built
By fear, hurt, judgment and pain
Mistrust clouded by storms of guilt
A friendship drowned in the rain.

Enough

My brain says there is something missing in my life
That this isn't enough
That I'm missing something

My heart yearns for what it does not have
What it does not know
What will make it whole

My mind speaks of wisdom of in searching for what is lost
A light on the horizon
A new beginning

My soul says all I need is what I have with me
Within my heart
Within His love

A Gnat into an Eagle

I once wrote a poem about a butterfly
These beautiful creatures with wings of light
In many ways you remind me of one
Ever striving to reach greater heights
You yearn for transformation and detachment from self
But you fear the responsibilities of flight
The distance you'd fall or the pain you'd inflict
If you didn't do everything exactly right

What you seem to be missing is the most important part
The process which allows it to fly
For a butterfly begins as a very small creature
Vulnerable, small and infinitely shy
A power beyond its own strength or might
Tests it so thoroughly that to itself it must die
But if it were to resist this transformation
It would never reach the heights of the sky

Right now you are wrapped in fear and doubt
Caged in by a force that is ripping you apart
Cocooned without light, you are anxious and scared
But know that this is the hardest part
He is breaking down walls that the "self" has put up
Transforming you into His work of Art
And all you must do to see light once again is
Place your life in His hands and His love in your heart

Trust He is giving you the tools you will need
To fly on the breeze of His tests
To share with the world your beautiful colors
To soar free and unsuppressed
Leave your fears on the ground and spread your wings
Trust He is guiding your quest
For within His love is the strength you need and
Armed with His name you are assured and blessed  

The Gift of Happiness

How could I not be unconsciously happy
In this wondrous place where His light shone
How could I not be filled with joy and wonder
At the way my spirit and mind have been honed
What astounding blessings have I been given
More profound and unfathomable than I have ever known
I pray with the fire which burns deep in my heart
That when I leave my capacity to serve Him will have grown

How could I not share this joy with others
When it has so graciously been bestowed upon me
How could I possibly cover this light
Which radiates and glows for all to see
This love and joy I find deep in your eyes
This laughter of life, this soul weaving glee
With happiness, laughter, joy and love
He gave us the gifts to set our souls free

A World in Hiding

These evils, impossible to undo
Are more unfathomable than I ever knew
The tests and pain, followed by shame
Then bullying, distancing and blame

Youth are hurt, innocence claimed
Their lives will never be the same
Then their peers, cause more tears
Evoking self hate and exploiting their fears

Yearning for compassion and understanding
They receive ridicule and reprimanding
A community hides, puts justice aside
And allows a poor child to drown in the tide

What will have to happen for all this to halt
For us to realize these deaths are our fault
To take control, make compassion our goal
And to love and support these lost and hurt souls?

Missing the Music in my Life

Your love brings music to my soul
The harmony fills me and makes me whole
Our chord so in tune
The tides and the moon
Oh how I pray to see you soon

A hole in my life where you should be
A grand piano with a missing key
Songs play without it
The sound doesn't quit
But there is an ache every time that it's hit

A hollow feeling of the missing chime
A reminder of a melody faded with time
A yearning to hear
The applause and the cheer
As my heart starts singing because you are near

The Same Moon

The moon out my window
Shines bright like the sun
A reminder each night
That the whole world is one

No matter the barriers
Or the hatred we croon
When we lay our heads down
We all see the same moon

The Waves of Life

She felt the waves roll through her
As they poured into the shore
Their elegance and beauty
Soared across her core
Deep inside her mind and heart
Were solemnly at war
But this time she was determined
Not to fear them as before

Standing up, she took a step
To face her fear and pain
As she walked in, the waves were harsh
No chance to breathe, no tread to gain
No matter how she struggled forward
She always fought in vain
For when the waves came strong and cruel
They took back what she obtained

Just as she was giving up
When she’d lost all will to try
A hand was stretched out to her
Someone had heard her cry
He held her firmly in His grip
And with Him by her side
No matter how they growled and roared
The waves flowed simply by

The Stamp

His seal, His stamp
Hath reached every land
And in turn

Every nation, every country
Has touched this stamp
And been touched by it.

The joy, the intoxication
Of visiting this blessed location
Will forever be

Stamped in our prayers, in our lives
The essence will always remain
Sealed in red.

Freedom from Fear

Sometimes fear invades
Imprisoning all thought
Heedless of time
Or the anguish that is wrought

A twisting inside
Controlling the breath
Confused and afraid
Reason's death

Caged by an enemy
In solitary confinement
Focusing on self
No soul’s refinement

Then just before despair
Ensnares the soul
A door of light opens
And you surrender control

The fear bleeds away
Burns in His fire
The spark of love ignites
Connection your desire

You realize that your fear
Was a lack of faith in Him
For in releasing the need to control
You’re set free from the self’s prison

"When one is released from the prison of self, that is indeed freedom! For self is the greatest prison."

A Wayfarer's Journey to Her Beloved

Lost and alone, confused and afraid
Not knowing what lay ahead
I searched my heart for His love and His aid
Guiding me to the path I should tread

When receiving the letter, emotions ensued
Joy mixed with heart stopping fear
The plane ride alone, a test of fortitude
The end of my Search drawing near

Traveling closer, overwhelmed and alight
No thoughts could enter my brain
That black and gold gate, a soul stirring sight
A moth in Love with a flame

Setting foot in the land of the lovers I saw
The reasons for all that had passed
Recognition and thankfulness filled me with awe
And a Knowledge of love eternal and vast

I walked down the path at one with His essence
Seeing Him in the stones and the trees
Detaching from self, my souls’ transcendence
Embraced by His Uniting breeze

As I walked through that historical gate
My soul was radiant with joy
The lack of shrouding and veils bade me wait
And with Contentment, I gazed at His Glory

With every step forward a new sight beheld
Each breath filled with awe and with trust
Lost in His Oneness all “sanity” quelled
In the whirlwind of Wonderment thrust

As I open that door, the self’s left behind
I breathe and my soul’s set aflame
All that’s left is His love, to the world I am blind
Poverty and Nothingness, my claim

Learning to Soar

Thoughts stir, when reading Your words
Lost in the world, the cheeping of birds
Yearning to focus, beginning again
I see the beauty, which flowed from Your pen

But then by the webs of the world I’m assailed
As I lose focus, Your beauty is veiled
My vision is clouded, I see only dust
Created by fear and a lack of trust

There are times I feel I am grasping at air
Searching for You, but left unaware
Caught in a web, I've spun for myself
Unable to find within me Your wealth

Imprisoned in the valley of search
Looking for love on which to perch
I can feel it there just out of reach
But the self holds me back, dampens my speech

Blinds my eyes, and grabs hold of my mind
Until I forget what I'm trying to find
Struggling to fly with my wings stuck together
A bird weighed down by the world's dross and fetters

I fall, crashing to the earth below
Losing sight for a time of the love You bestow
Thinking only of self I worry and fear
Until Your confirmations draw me near

You pull me away, untangle the net
And remind me of something I often forget
That thoughts of self dampen the soul
While thoughts of You make me whole

I take a deep breath, and strive once more
Begging forgiveness, praying to soar
On the wings of Your love, a hairs breath longer
To learn from the past, my wings made stronger

I begin to pray, feeling the warmth of your fire
Your light and essence my only desire
And deep in the depths of my soul I aspire,
To someday be ablaze upon Your burning pyre.

Battling the Self

This never ending battle I fight
Every day, every night
Searching in the depths of my mind
Unsure what I’ll find
Trying desperately to destroy
An enemy, a decoy
I struggle with all my strength and might
A silent foe never in sight
I cry in pain and in confusion I weep
Slimily its roots sink deep
Unchecked they reach into my core
I chop them off, I go to war
Someday I’ll be free of the pain they inflict
Someday I’ll win this inner conflict

A Pure Heart – Inspired by a story from Ruhi Book 3: Teaching Children’s Classes Grade 1

She was privileged to hear Him speak
His voice so pure, His love so deep
As she sat enraptured by His words
Her heart was soaring with the birds

Listening to His words so wise
A longing seeped out of her eyes
At her glass of water she stared
Wishing her inmost thoughts He shared

If only my heart he could acquire
And empty it of every earthly desire
And then refill it with God’s love
And understanding from above

This thought went through her mind quite fast
And just as quickly it had passed
No words were spoken from her lips
But her heart He read like an eclipse

He continued to speak, his listeners enthralled
But quietly a servant was called
A few words were spoken in a language unknown
Her cup was emptied, no reason shown

As He spoke He moved around
And later He came without a sound
Picking up a pitcher He filled her cup
Only she noticed, no one looked up

But she knew He was answering her heart’s desire
His kindness brought the joy she yearned to acquire
He knew all along, the purity inside
Her heart was open, nothing to hide

Through her story we know that our hearts must be pure
For God can see everything, of this be assured
They are open to Him, like a poster board chart
So remember His first counsel to have a kind and pure heart

A Deeper Purpose

Breaking down the barriers,
Thoughts like ice shatter,
Wood of walls erected inside
Formed into a ladder

Guided to the surface
Shown the truth from up above
A deeper purpose seen
To shine and share His love

Your inner light and wisdom
A blessing to us all
The book of knowledge opened wide
Sharing deeper meaning to His call.

Be a Force for Change

Every time she hears the noise, she cringes in fear
Doesn’t matter that she hasn’t lived there in years
Growing up in the middle of a war, a child all alone
Forced to leave the only place she’d ever called her home
Her family lost all they had, had to start anew
But the need to be a force for change stayed with her as she grew

For she always remembered:
When a thought of war comes, think a stronger thought of peace
Block out the hateful drums, and let your love increase
Show friendship to all, be truthful and sincere
Break down the oppressive walls and the savagery of man will disappear.

Her heart stayed with the people, the injustice that they saw
Created in her a desire to help which left me in awe
By telling me her story, my view of war expanded
I learned that we don’t have to accept the world that we are handed
Change in mind becomes change in heart, one voice is all we need
Reminding us that changing our thoughts removes the foundation for hatred to breed.

And now I always remember:
When a thought of war comes, think a stronger thought of peace
Block out the hateful drums, and let your love increase
Show friendship to all, be truthful and sincere
Break down the oppressive walls and the savagery of man will disappear.

Put down your guns, oh ye soldiers of God
For you are the ones, who will crack the facade
Clasp hands and unfurl, the banners that reign
And do not think peace in the world, impossible to attain

When a thought of war comes, think a stronger thought of peace
Block out the hateful drums, and let your love increase
Show friendship to all, be truthful and sincere
Break down the oppressive walls and the savagery of man will disappear.

The Storm

Pressure builds inside
Stemming from some place unknown
Wishing I could hide
Even though I’m fully grown

Sickness in my gut
Uncertainty from clouds rain down
Wheels stuck in a rut
Water rising as I drown

Bewilderment reigns
Crushing me into a sea
Fighting off its chains
Lost amongst all the debris

Wind whips all around
Muffling my silent plea
Throws me to the ground
Where I find the golden key

Every time I trip
The ground is there to catch my fall
I may lose my grip
Eyes blind I’ll have to crawl

But it will always be
Supporting me my whole life through
When I’m lost at sea
It will guide me to a life anew

God is my foundation
His love, the ground beneath my feet
My only aspiration
In His love I am complete

Set Them Aglow

She arrived extra early
That first class we had
She couldn’t wait to start
Her smile a work of art
The joy written on her face
The love in that first embrace
Gave me strength and helped me fly
And I remember soaring in her big blue eyes

These children are waiting for us to arise
To love them and help them to reach for the skies
To spiritually guide them and help them to grow
So show them God’s love and set them aglow

He was timid and shy
Afraid to reply
But nothing compared
To his radiant prayer
He was filled with a love no power can mar
And he truly was a brilliant star
Though small for his size he was extremely wise
And I remember soaring in his big brown eyes

These children are waiting for us to arise
To love them and help them to reach for the skies
To spiritually guide them and help them to grow
So show them God’s love and set them aglow

Regard them as mines rich in gems
As flowers growing from a single stem
Educate them and teach them to shine
The beauty inside which is pure and Divine
For they will learn and like gold be refined
And uplift and empower the whole of mankind.

These children are waiting for us to arise
To love them and help them to reach for the skies
To spiritually guide them and help them to grow
So show them God’s love and set them aglow.

Independent Investigation of Truth

We live our lives in ignorance
Uncertain of the truth
Everything we think we know
Was learned before our youth

A life of lies produces lies
A person learns what they’ve been told
But at some point it becomes our job
To break out of this mould

Investigate, search and find
The answers which you seek
Followers don’t know the truth
Their minds are lost and weak

Unrestrictedly take control,
For actuality become a sleuth
See through your own two eyes
And independently investigate the truth.

Blessed.

Blessed. In Awe. Loved. Radiant.
The way I feel when I see
Your beautiful faces, around these places
Where I am so blessed to be
Thank you for your love, this gift from above
To my heart you have been the key
Your friendship pours, and my soul it soars
Flying unfettered and free
The love you share, is my life and my air
Raising me to the branch of that Tree.
A year has flown by, the blink of an eye
In this place across the sea
My deep and sincere, wish for this year
Is that your hearts be filled with glee.
For when you rejoice, I can hear His voice
The greatest gift you could ever give me.

Empty Chairs and Broken Chimes

Memories of life unknown
Confusion and joy intertwined
Sadness envelopes this heart of stone
Lost words hidden from the blind

Empty hollowness builds
Fearing loss and pain
The dripping sanity stilled
Falling steadily with the rain

Sighs unheard and unseen
Fabricated smiles shine
Holes rip through the spleen
Lines of everything fine

Loneliness settles unsuspecting
Good-byes choke the tongue
Fortresses of steel erecting
Recalling songs no longer sung

Entangled in the webs of self
The bite of death encroaches
Time creeps up on you in stealth
The hour of loss approaches

Nostalgic thoughts of joys now lost
Haunting joys of present times
Freezing in the winter frost
Empty chairs and broken chimes

The Power of a Smile

“O Son of Man! Rejoice in the gladness of thine heart, that thou mayest be worthy to meet Me and to mirror forth My beauty.”

When I see your smiling face
My heart is filled with light
It takes me to a place
Where His love shines glorious and bright
Every time I meet you
I am introduced again
To a spiritual beauty pure and true
A mirror with no end

Our soul’s rejoiceful meeting
Brings gladness to my heart
For in your radiant greeting
Is a perfect work of art
A masterpiece of bliss
The heartbeat of the world
What deep transformation exists
In this radiance unfurled

My foundation is recentered
My love for Him increased
Once this joy has entered
It screams to be released
I yearn to mirror forth
This beauty that’s inside
To inspire others to see their worth
The nobility they hide

And so I share with them
This gift you gave to me
Shining light into a gem
Produces radiance for all to see
In a single smile
We find a force for change
And there can be no denial
That hearts are rearranged

For when you smile with your heart
His beauty you reflect
And with each smile you start
Your own social and economic development project.

“O Son of Man! Rejoice in the gladness of thine heart, that thou mayest be worthy to meet Me and to mirror forth My beauty.”

Sunset

When I see the sun in the sky
I become more aware
That His love is always there
For us to feel and share
The source of everything
The lifeblood of the earth
Remember to look for worth
By finding him within

I want to watch the sun set
On this beautiful day
I want to see the rays
Make color from this gray
As the sun goes down,
It will light up the sky
And that's when I
Will find Him

Sun meets earth,
Earth touches man
You can feel His love
In the warmth of the sand
Even in the night
When you can't see the light
You know its just around the earth's bend
And at dawn you will see it's radiance once again

My Prayer

Pull me from this web of self
Teach me to shine forth your wealth
To let go of jealousy and pain
To wash them away with the rain
When I'm lost and tired and can't go on
Hold my hand until the dawn
Carry me until I find my centre
Until in my heart I allow You to enter
Teach me patience, joy and love
So I can shine Your light from above
Make me ever aware
This is my prayer

A Dream – Inspired By an Episode in the Life of May Ellis Maxwell

In my early youth, asleep one night
Came the Sun of Truth, my soul to ignite
I dreamed of light, so pure and glorious
It blinded my sight, but left me victorious

On a different eve, while shrouded in slumber
My soul took leave, cloaked in wonder
I was taken through space, to a place of birth
Through light and grace, I saw the earth

Marked with seals, one word was seen
Transforming ideals, its beauty serene
Of this soul stirring word, I saw only two letters
I felt like a bird, released from its fetters

The H and the B, would transform my life
The Branch of that Tree, would end all my strife
And then I was blessed, with an image - the Master
My soul was possessed, my heart beat faster

This vision came to me, and then in that second,
Across the glittering sea, I was beckoned,
After nearly two decades, I answered His call
With the Concourses’ aides, I gave Him my all

Of that first meeting, I can remember naught
The feelings fleeting, my entire being caught
“Neither joy nor pain, nor anything … I can name”
Did I retain, except the force of His overwhelming flame

When He left our presence, I came back with a start
The feeling of evanescence, as we were forced to depart
But then His spirit from on High, came into my heart
And what choice had I, but His message to impart.

Paths of Stone

White and red, the path I tread,
Illumined with light from above.
Broken and round, how solid the ground,
Leading me to His love.
As people walk by, their inner eye,
Directed towards His Shrine.
Their souls aflame, their only aim,
Connecting to the Divine.
The stones just before, you walk through that door,
Tell a unique and beautiful story.
Gathered by hands, from Israeli sands,
Their steadfastness rewarded in glory.
Smooth and round, lain on the ground,
By believers filled with grace.
From a distance their unity adds to the beauty,
Of that Holy and Beloved place.
But when there's a storm, they completely transform,
The dross of this world's washed away.
And under the dust, lies hidden a trust,
Of beauty we'll never betray.
Uniquely composed, gems are exposed,
By the flood of His abounding Grace.
This same depth of glory, can be seen in the story,
Of the entire human race.

With Love

Hearts more pure you couldn’t find
Divinely connected, soul’s entwined
Eyes so genuine your love it shines
The beauty of God in every line

Side by side you’ll walk together
Through life’s tests and stormy weather
Serving and radiant in all you do
God’s abounding grace always in view

Two orbs of light capturing hearts
Luminous rays from the very start
Bringing peace to every soul
Illumining every darkened hole

Your personalities are the perfect blend
Of love and joy there is no end
In your presence my soul transcends
So blessed am I to be called a friend

A message from the Higher Self to the lower self

Stop.
Stop telling yourself that it matters.
What they think.
If they find you awkward or annoying or embarrassing.
If you are disappointing their good opinion of you.
Stop worrying whether you are good enough.
Smart enough.
Talented enough to be their friend.
Stop feeling like friendship is something you have to earn.
Like showing emotions will force people away.
Stop changing yourself to be who you think they want you to be.
Stop hiding.
Stop fearing
Stop.
Be you.
Trust them enough to love you no matter who “you” are.
Trust yourself enough not to care if they don’t.
Trust that regardless of who you are, people are much more attracted to the genuine.
Stop being weighed down by the self.
Let Me shine through.
The clouds, the storm, the pain, the loneliness, will go away.
You’ll be left with joy and humor and happiness and peace.
The uncertainty, the fear, the anguish will disappear.
You will never feel alone if you truly let Me in.
Believe in Me.
Trust in Me.
Love Me.
For that is the only way to truly love you.

Rain

Watch the rain as it falls,
Filling holes, breaking walls.
Barriers crash, dams break,
Ice melts, our world shakes.
Emotions enter, wanted or not
Everything we thought we forgot.
Each drop, a crystal clear tear,
Dissolving the anger, diluting the fear.
The negative emotions seep onto the ground,
And into the sewers where they will never be found.
What is left in the end is a deep sense of awe,
A feeling of calm, just after the thaw.
We’re left feeling thoughtful, awake and serene,
Our hearts are clean and God can be seen.
As the sun comes back out, it brightens the sky,
Life starts anew and without fetters we fly.

A Brilliant Star

You see me beautiful
Each and every day
Your eyes see more in me
Then I knew I could portray
Yet your own brilliant light
You do not know is there
Of the joy you bring to others
You are completely unaware
 
You see yourself as broken
Mourning the bruises from your past
Your heart feels hurt and empty
Your happiness doesn’t last
If only you could have my eyes
And look at yourself through me
For when I look into your soul
The depth is deeper then the sea
 
With a single laugh and smile
You brighten every heart
You are a brilliant example
And God’s perfect work of art
Your humility and kindness
Draw people from all around
Your amazing joy-filled laughter
Is one of the world’s most beautiful sounds
 
Your light shines through your eyes
Not broken by your disguise
The purity of your soul
Could fill the darkest hole
Learn to look and see yourself
The way you see everybody else
For in everything you do you shine
A light so brilliant it must be Divine, and
I am so blessed to call you a friend of mine.

A New World

When I look at the world around me,
Negativity and degradation invade everything I see.
Babies dying, mother’s crying,
Leading figures constantly lying.
Children growing up too quick,
Creating a world that is spiritually sick.
“Adrift in a sea of materialism”
The media governs with imperialism
Fanaticism strangling individual thought
Nations fighting wars that have already been fought.
People being abused and used
Hearts left bruised and confused
Families torn apart
Judgment and anger clouds the heart,
I see self-inflicted pain and suffering
Violence and injury with no one recovering,
And the disintegration of society hovering.

However, there is a way to fix what has gone amiss,
And to pull our world from this spiritually empty abyss.
Create a new world where wars don’t exist,
Where friendships are not things we must resist.
Where love can be shown, hatred isn’t known,
Innocence is inherent, and ignorance transparent.
Where differences aren’t fuel for the cruel,
And encouragement is the natural rule.
A world where children can grow and learn,
And achieve the heights for which they yearn.
Where joy is not a sign of weakness,
Patience does not equal meekness.
Where injustice is corrected, no one neglected,
And the Light of the World is fully reflected.
Where God is the source of light,
His mercy and forgiveness the force of life.
Where the light of unity envelops all
And everyone has heard His call.

I’m not afraid for the future of our world
A new one is already being unfurled
For I know people who with their very lives
Embody these qualities and with every breath strive
To revive and create this world anew
And these agents of change are you.

Say Nothing

This article is truly heartbreaking. It's heartbreaking that something like this could happen, and even more heartbreaking that people just stood around and watched it happen without even trying to help.



http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2009/10/27/BAG11AAR56.DTL



They stand and watch
Say nothing
They see her pain
Say nothing
She lives in fear
Say nothing
Her pain severe
Say nothing

Just another girl
Pulled into the whirl pool
Slowly twisting
No control
Can’t escape
Time takes its toll

They see her abused
Say nothing
They stand and enjoy
Say nothing
Her world ripped apart
Say nothing
Where are their hearts?
Say nothing

Just another soul
Losing her control
Slowly changing
Meaning fading
Can’t see light
Darkness invading

She is silent
Say nothing
They are silent
Say nothing
Who will speak?
Say nothing
When our coping technique
…is to….
Say nothing.
Nothing.

I Give It All To You

Mirza Mihdi to you I give my heart
To you I give my soul
Fly it from here, make me whole.
You gave your life so I could be here
And now I give it to you
Oh Pure One, help me to be faithful and true

Mona to you I give my senses
To you I give my sight
Illumine my inner being, fill me with light
You gave your life, but I am here
Help me to be like you
Joyful and steadfast, sincerity shining through

Anis to you I give my essence
To you I give my world
Help me to be steadfast and watch the new unfurled
You gave your life to be with Him
Help me to give mine too
Help me to be steadfast as a rock that no earthly storm can move

Baha’u’llah to you I give my everything
My heart, my soul, my senses, my essences
Erase myself for my transcendence
You gave me my life and faith
And I give them both to You
Teach me to let Your light shine through in everything I do.

Dare to Dream

Take a breath,
Do it for yourself.
Look inside,
Don't look anywhere else.
Dare to dream,
See it in your mind.
Take a step,
And leave everything else behind.

You never know what the future might hold,
If you let go and just let it unfold.
Step into the sun and forget the cold.
Do you dare do dream or become who you're told...
..to be.
Can't you see?

As you walk,
Pave your own path.
Look ahead,
Possibilities stream past.
Dare to dream,
See it in your mind.
Begin to run,
And leave everything else behind.

You never know what the future might hold,
If you let go and just let it unfold.
Step into the sun and forget the cold.
Do you dare do dream or become who you're told...
..to be.
Can't you see?

Dare to dream,
Dare to dream,
Dare to dream,
Dare to dream
Dare to dream.

You Don’t Need Them to Tell You You’re Beautiful

I see you there
Sitting in a darkened room
Wishing that they knew your gloom
And could see through your costume

I see you there
Watching as they walk by
Wishing they would turn and try
To see the soul behind your eyes

You don’t need them to tell you you’re beautiful
Look inside and find the girl
Who is anything but plain
Who cries for other’s pain
Who dances in the rain
Look inside and find the one
Who sees what you are worthy of
Who fills your heart with His love
Who is watching you from up above
He will show you that you’re beautiful.

You feel alone,
Living inside a cyclone
You live your life like a drone
Wait for hours by the phone
Put words for their thoughts unknown
Your beauty is stepped on and stoned.

But if you only knew, the beauty there inside of you
Look inside and find the girl
Who is anything but plain
Who cries for other’s pain
Who dances in the rain
Look inside and find the one
Who sees what you are worthy of
Who fills your heart with His love
Who is watching you from up above
He will show you that you’re beautiful.

Allow yourself to shine
Don’t let their thoughts invade your mind
Don’t fall in and resign
And become a clone, dead and blind

Be true to what’s inside
Show the beauty you try to hide
Let His love be your guide
For if in Him you choose to confide
He will always be there to provide

You don’t need them to tell you you’re beautiful
Look inside and find the girl
Who is anything but plain
Who cries for other’s pain
Who dances in the rain
Look inside and find the one
Who sees what you are worthy of
Who fills your heart with His love
Who is watching you from up above
He will show you that you’re beautiful.

You don’t need them to tell you you’re beautiful
He will show you that you’re beautiful.
Because you are.... Beautiful, absolutely beautiful.

I Live in Fear

I live in fear
Of not being enough
Of not sharing enough
Of sharing too much
Of being my own crutch

I live in fear
Of not seeing the truth
Of missing my youth
Of making a mistake
Of being called a fake

I live in fear
Of you
Of what you do
Of what you say
Of being betrayed

I live in fear
Of your gossip
Of being your topic
Of your teasing
Of not being pleasing

I live in fear.
Of your criticism
Of your pessimism
Of your harassment
Of your judgment

I live in fear
Of not being accepted into your world
Of not being good enough for you
Of losing you if I don’t change who I am
Of losing myself if I do

Their Eyes

When I look in your faces every day,
I can see you’re sad and lonely
Your eyes show pain beyond your years
Filled with lost hope and unshed tears

You live in the shadows of a world that is drowning
Falling apart piece by piece
There is grief in the past and no hope for tomorrow
Only suffering, only sorrow

Chorus:
Every child is a brilliant star
Whose light can illumine your heart
But so many children are stars slowly falling
Their resplendence diminishes, darkness takes over
And the only proof of this loss in the skies
Is the loss of light in their eyes.

The bruises fade but the pain never leaves
So young to lose faith in the world
I see the innocence drain from your eyes
You fake a smile but I see through your disguise.

Chorus

The dawn is coming and the world will be bright
The spark of truth is about to ignite
Have faith and hold on to the beauty within
Don’t let the present darkness win
Oh Giver protect these children
Help them to bear and endure
Guide and protect them in this harsh world
And teach them to shine their light so pure.

Chorus:
Every child is a brilliant star
Whose light can illumine your heart
Protect their innocence and keep them from falling
Guide them to shine, radiance overflowing
Let’s raise them to glow and light up the skies
And to fill the world with the light from their eyes.

A Drop of Water

A drop of water,
Though small and fragile
Holds the secrets of the universe
The whispers of the angels

The hint of a smile
The rustle of cloth
A light in the dark
The wings of a moth

The dew on a tree
The blink of an eye
A flicker of color
A star in the sky

So open your eyes
And let go of your fears
For the vastness of God and the Light of the World,
Can only be seen if you drown yourself in a drop of water.



The Song version

A Drop of Water

A drop of water
Though fragile and small
Holds the secrets of the universe
And the whispers of angels
The dew on a leaf
The rustle of cloth
A light in the darkest night
And the flight of a moth

Chorus:
Open your eyes
Let go your fears
For the ocean of God,
Though so vast is so near
Surrender your mind
Drown in His knowledge and you’ll find
Immersed in the ocean He designed
You are united with all mankind.

A drop of water
Though tiny and frail
Reflects the essence of His beauty
And the mysteries of this world
The hint of a smile
The joy in your eye
The rays of the Sun of Truth
And the stars in the sky

Chorus:
Open your eyes
Let go your fears
For the ocean of God,
Though so vast is so near
Surrender your mind
Drown in His knowledge and you’ll find
Immersed in the ocean He designed
You are united with all mankind.

Bridge:
“Every drop of…water… crieth out”
“Proclaiming unto all” He will bring life to this drought
The river of His knowledge will guide you on your way
Jump into the ocean it’s the dawn of a new day

Chorus (x2)

A Kiss from Above

They came to me one night,
When change had cleared my sight
My heart had opened to love
Then came the kiss from above

Chorus:
A kiss which changed my world
A whole new world unfurled
A kiss to light the dark
A kiss to open my heart

As I lay there filled with strife
Contemplating how my life
Could ever be compared
To the martyrdom they had shared

A calm came over me
Then in my vision I could see
Their faces drifting near
So happy and so clear

Chorus

A kiss on the cheek caused such change
My soul, my meaning were rearranged
My future would be filled with happiness and love
For I knew they were watching me from above

Chorus

Father's Day Poem

Since I've been told there aren't enough funny poems on here, here is one that I wrote for fathers day for my dad at least a few years ago.

To a father who’s crazy in all the best ways
Whose jokes put most people into a daze
Who owns more movies then I could watch in a year
And whose angry face fills me with everything but fear

On this festive occasion of celebrating fathers
A time you often say “don’t bother”
I salute a dad who makes me laugh
Who is definitely my mother’s “other half”

A dad who loves Pooh, Eeyore and Roo
And Star Trek, Star Wars and Space Balls too,
Who will always read the books I share
And whose head is missing some of its hair

Whether a mad scientist or Bozo you take all our jokes
And no matter what we tell you, we do love our folks.
So in lieu of a card or a sword way overdue
I composed a poem especially for you!

Rain

As the rain falls outside, I sit and ponder. The sound of each raindrop feels like a massage on my soul. Slowly releasing the tension in my heart. Slowly helping me find the peace that exists inside myself. I feel all tension, fear and apprehension slide away leaving calm in its wake. A calm that takes over my whole body and allows me to truly relax. Something I haven't done in a long time. I get up and walk outside. As I stand in the rain, each raindrop reminds me of the beauty that is nature and that is God. I feel all this tension, fear and apprehension that I have just released, wash away with the rain. Leaving me clean and refreshed both inside and out.

Transition

I’m lost in the dark of transition.
No stars to guide my way.
Knowing the light is just a few hours away.
I see the light of possibility dawning for me, if I can hold out just a few short months.
But there is no light between then and now.
No stars, no sun, no moon, nothing.
I know the sun is about to rise.
But that knowledge doesn’t help me live in the dark right now any more then the promise of wealth someday helps a poor man to feed his family in the present.
It’s nice to know, but I’m still lost in the dark, counting down the days until I will see light again.
As the days pass by, time moves slower and slower
Like a curve graph getting closer and closer to zero but never hitting it.
Will I ever hit zero, or will I continue to halve the distance but never actually reach it.
Will I be lost in the dark forever?
Even with a definitive date, the question of getting there is a big one.
How long will I wait?
Will the months feel like years?
Will the years feel like decades?
Will the decades feel like centuries?
Could three months literally take forever?

Death

My beauty is gone
My love alone
My feelings repressed
My hurt not shown

The joy has dispersed
The silence begins
The sadness ignored
The numbness wins

Everything lost
Nothing gained
Nothing heard
Everything drained

Alone in this world
Alone on this earth
No future in sight
No sense of worth

The death of a dream
The death of a place
The death of a future
The death of a face

Sand

Sand.
It layers everything.
My heart, my mind, my life.
They are all covered and entrenched in sand.
Sand governs my life.
Sometimes it falls so quickly, that I can’t see anything around me.
My eyes stop working, I become blind to everything but the falling of sand.
I lose sight of the world around me, lose sight of myself.
It falls, and falls until my body is stuck in a cocoon of sand.
A cocoon which suffocates me, forcing all the air out of my body.
Then it slows, leaving me unable to move, or do anything.
It falls so slowly, it makes me want to cry.
So slowly that I can see everything around me in more detail than I wish.
Every nuance, every dirty, dusty, pale, faded aspect of everything around and inside of me.
Everything is cruelly lain out in front of me.
Cruelly seen, but unable to be touched, to be changed.
It cuts me off from everything and everyone.
Leaving me alone, and silent.
I yearn to break out of this prison.
This jail made of sand.
I yearn for wings to fly away from this place.
To soar to some other place, where sand does not exist.
To someplace where life is fulfilling.
Where love can be felt.
Where survival isn’t a struggle.
Yet for the moment, I’m trapped.
Ensnared in this prison.
Enveloped in blindness.
Lost in the sand.



For people who know me and think this is about Tucson, its not. Its about time.

Draining Desert

My love drains away,
Dampened by the dirt
Cactus prick my heart
And bleed away the hurt

Life becomes a lie
My soul hidden from me
Lost somewhere
My eyes no longer see

I can’t feel the beat
The love or the hate
A wall around my heart
Which I did not create

Layers of dirt
Hide what has been done
The red turns to naught
Faded by the sun

Brain becoming hazy
Disconnected from the rest
Life no longer real
Everything repressed

My being turns to sand
Falling every day
Waiting for God
To make colors from this gray.

Waiting For Wonder

Each time I think of it, my heart aches and tears stream down my face. Not so much in sadness, as in longing. I yearn to walk out of my house and be struck with awe at the beauty. To breathe in deeply and have my lungs filled with ecstasy, with calm, with peace. The peace that only nature can bring. The peace that only true deep love can create. Perhaps this is only a dream. Perhaps it is a reality that I must forge for myself. A glimpse of what my future could hold if I would let it.

In my mind I see a girl sitting by a warm fire, in a beautiful brick fireplace. Watching the snow fall outside. Each flake lightly gliding down past the windowsill. Muffling the sounds and stress of the world. Leaving in it’s wake, a calm sense of tranquility. Everything grows still and quiet. All that is heard is the slight pitter-patter of the snow layering the roof. Time ceases to exist. She sits there for hours, not realizing that a single second has passed. Slowly the snowfall grows thinner and thinner, until it stops. She gets up and walks outside, not knowing what to expect, not even realizing she has gotten up. Just letting her body go where it yearns to be.

Standing in the doorway she can see the thick snow layering the ground. She can see the mountains in all their glory reaching up to the sky. Seemingly so close and yet in reality so far away. Creating an awe-inspiring contrast of white on blue. A sky so blue it is as if she is looking into God’s eyes. Connecting on a deeper level than she has ever connected before. Deeper than heart to heart. Even deeper than soul to soul. It is essence to essence. As if she never truly existed until that moment. Each breath she takes is her first breath. Every sense is awakened. She has no thought but to stand there. No feeling but the wind in her hair, the cold, clear air in her lungs, the joy in her heart. No understanding or classification of what she is seeing. Her brain has shut down completely, leaving her body to do the listening and comprehension. She finally understands what it truly is to “live in the moment.” No thoughts in her mind. No words to describe what she is feeling. Simply the moment and nothing else.

In my mind, this girl slowly becomes me. She walks inside and sits back down by the window. She sits and she waits. She waits for the cactus to become pine trees, for the dirt to become snow, for the heat to become cold. She waits for the air to become crisp. She waits for her heart to be truly happy again. She waits. Patiently she waits for the day when she will be able to sit and watch the snow fall again. She waits patiently for the day when she will be able to stand outside in the cold air with the sun on her face, completely in the moment with no thoughts for the future or the past. She is tucked away inside of me, but she will always be there. Waiting. Patiently waiting.

Where I Am From

I was born in a land of perseverance,
In Israel where my parents were serving
In this place so surrounded by God
Was created a love unswerving

I come from mountains and grass and trees
Where the air is fresh and the water clear
The glaciers and rivers live inside me
From Alaska which I hold so dear

I was born from the mind of my mother,
And conceived in her heart long before,
A piece of her soul has melded to mine,
And will reside with me forever more

While my soul was born from my mother,
My dad shaped my thoughts and my mind,
He taught me to question and think for myself,
And to love the whole of mankind

My brother created my actions
He loved me from the day I was born,
I wasn’t always what he wished me to be
But I learned a lot from his love and his scorn

I come from the friendships I had as a child
And the newer friendships I’ve made
I live from the people who live in my heart
And my love for them will never fade

True Beauty

True beauty comes from within
When you laugh, when you grin
Your eyes show the beauty of your soul
Their light brightens even the darkest hole

Like a candle in the dark
They show what is truly in your heart
So the next time you feel the need to judges someone's size
Don't look at their body, just look in their eyes.

You're Not Alone

Sitting in your room
Looking at the door
Wishing things could change
The pain could be no more
You feel completely lost
There’s a hollow place inside
In the agony of your mind
A hundred times you’ve died

Look inside yourself
See the strength within (Don’t give in)
To the anguish in your heart
And all that is unknown (Remember)
You’re not alone
Many people feel this way
You will make it through
Look inside of you
You’re not alone

You hurt yourself
To know you feel
But you feel so much
You are numb to what’s real
You look to others
But they are lost too
They feed your agony
And seem to desert you

Look inside yourself
See the strength within (Don’t give in)
To the anguish in your heart
And all that is unknown (Remember)
You’re not alone
Many people feel this way
You will make it through
Look inside of you
You’re not alone

You’re not alone
Many people feel this way
You will make it through
Look inside of you
You’re not alone

Good-bye

When you smile, my life feels complete
Your joy fills me from my head to my feet
This past year your light has guided me through
And my heart would be empty if I'd never met you

Chorus:
I don't want to leave
I can't say good-bye
What will I do without you in my life?
Time passes by
This year's almost gone
How can we just say good-bye and move on

You've made me cry, you've made me laugh
And I am so grateful I chose this path
Even now when so soon we will part
These memories will stay with me forever in my heart

Chorus:
I don't want to leave
I can't say good-bye
What will I do without you in my life?
Time passes by
This year's almost gone
Now we must just say good-bye and move on

Good-Bye - I'll miss you
Good-Bye - I love you
Good-Bye - I pray we'll meet again
Good-Bye

What Has Happened to Our Hearts?

I’ve been living in a world of pain and sorrow
With grief in the past and no hope for tomorrow
We’re stuck in a world of open wounds
Unsure how to evade the fast approaching doom

Chorus
This world is falling apart
Were we just doomed from the start?
When families and communities are broken
This wound is forced more and more open
And the question that should be spoken
Is what has happened to our hearts?

We’re surrounded by agony everywhere we look
It’s on everyone’s faces like an open book
Please don’t ignore what’s right in front of you
People are dieing while you block the view

Chorus

Find love for one another
Find hope for the future
Find it inside you to be unified
Don’t look at a problem and hide
Find God in everything on this earth
Don’t leave it to rot and lose it’s worth

Chorus

Find God

Learn to focus, learn to love,
Learn to find guidance from above
Seek the beauty, seek the light,
Seek the one who came as a thief in the night
Find His guidance, find His care,
Find the strength and joy He shares
But also know when life seems unfair,
that His love for you, will always be there.

I Live to be Me

I Live To Be Me (March 2007)

I used to ache and feel alone,
I used to hide, no feelings shone,
I hated myself, but not anymore
My life has changed from my skin to my core

Chorus
I live to be me
I live to be free
I live to be happy endlessly
I live to dance
I live to sing
I’m alive, and now I live to be me

No longer will I change myself for you
No longer will I take a self-conscious view
Not another day, will I shy away
For here is who I am today

Chorus

Too drunk

Too drunk to stand, too drunk to see
Too drunk to realize, life is escaping me
Too drunk to live, too drunk to care
Too drunk to see you standing there.
Why do you watch? What’s so amazing?
Watching my vision become more and more hazy.
You see me stumble, you see me fall.
But do you really care at all?
I’m lost, I’m scared, my soul is cracked
But all you see is a humorous act.

What is Happening to the Children

When I look in your faces every day,
I can see you’re sad and lonely
Your eyes show pain beyond your years
What is happening to the children?

Chorus:
These children grow up to quickly
Walking through the world alone,
No one there to guide them or lend them a hand
Why does no one do anything?

The bruises fade but the pain never leaves
Suffering in silence, your souls seem to bleed
How quickly innocence drains out of your eyes
What is happening to the children?

Chorus

We see the signs but don’t say a word
Your eyes scream for help but nothing is heard
We live in denial, and you’re left alone
What is happening to the children?

Chorus

In the Middle

Tradition dictates where he goes
He has no choice in this
Struggling to live between two different parents
Who love him in different ways

Chorus
Stuck in the middle
With nowhere to go
So young to know this pain
Learning how not to let it show

I see the light on his face
When he sees his father coming
The trust in his eyes, the love on both faces,
Yet mostly he’s stuck with his mother

Chorus
Stuck in the middle
With nowhere to go
So young to know this pain
Learning how not to let it show

Neither parent is bad
They both love him a lot
But his mother always looks at him with a purpose
While his father only ever with love

Chorus
Stuck in the middle
With nowhere to go
So young to know this pain
Learning how not to let it show

Death

Until its close it’s too far away
It’s unbelievable and unlikely, unknown and unthought-of
Like a rash on your skin, never seen what’s happening within
Only noticeable after the fact
Like a magicians disappearing act
A phone call, an email, a knock on the door
Your whole foundation, thrown to the floor
Life gains boundaries, beginning and end
Continuing quickly following this trend
Then you realize the thing you’ve found
That your life is just another sand grain on the ground.

Questioning Myself

Constant guilt
Constant fear
Am I doing what I should be here?
Constant judgment
Constant pain
Surrounded by a cloud of shame.
Keep my focus
Keep my calm
Yet my fears cannot be qualmed
What can I do?
What can I change?
In order to feel I’m living up to my name?
I’m here to do service
I’m here to teach
But I fear my goals are out of reach.

Faith or Fantasy

My heart yearns to find him
It beats in time with his
I ache to feel completely loved
Yet am afraid it will never come
I fear for myself what will happen
If I never find his love
Will I live in hope the rest of my life
Or die of disappointment and loss.
Where is my beloved?
Does he even exist?
Or am I yearning for the unattainable?

Unworthy of Love

I feel it again, that sinking feeling in my heart
Which makes me feel like the only place I am worthy of being
is on the ground, under someone’s shoe.
That feeling, not that no one loves me,
but rather that no one should love me,
that I am such an idiot, everyone should be laughing at me and talking behind my back,
and in my mind all I can picture is this happening.
It doesn’t matter whether people are talking about me or not.
Because my mind becomes my reality and reality ceases to exist.

Insecurity

Insecurity is the bane of my existence
I think it’s gone, but it’s only hiding,
Waiting for the best time to show its face again
My mind has trust in everyone except me,
It is easily persuaded by opinions it puts in everyone else’s minds
Which range anywhere from annoyance to idiot to incompetent
Then my mind takes these “opinions” and makes them its own
So by the end of the day I look like the biggest idiot in the world… to myself.
It is a never ending whirlpool leading me straight into the ground
I am broken by all of the unsaid statements that may or may not even exist in other peoples’ minds.
If only I could learn to switch off my mind, I think then I could truly learn to love myself, and with that, be happy.

Happiness is an Inside Job

You are your strongest means of achieving happiness
You chose to be happy, whether you believe it or not.
You make the choice to let others run your life
You believe you need others to help you live
But in reality you are crippling yourself
You are forcing yourself to believe that you can't fix your own problems
And in so doing, you are ensuring that you will never truly be happy
For you and only you have the power to control your emotions.
You feel happy, you feel lonely, you feel empty, you feel loved, you feel sadness, you feel hurt, you feel ignored, you feel inferior, you feel self-conscious, you feel like an outsider..
All of this is you! You decide how you feel.
Your mind is the life force for all your insecurities
Listen to your heart, and learn to love yourself, only then can you ever truly be happy.

Watching Myself Fall Apart

I’ve worked so hard
Not to become obsessed
I focus on my life
So I won’t fall like the rest

Yet something about you
Makes me tremble in fear
I can’t seem to avoid
Wishing you were here

I see you on stage
My heart skips a beat
I yearn to be singing
But am stuck in my seat

You don’t know my name
Or the way that I feel
If I have to be honest
You probably never will

I’m just one of the crowd
Adoring you from afar
Yet in watching I’m pulled
To become what you are

I write my own lyrics
And want to sing them
But I don’t write music
And I know that’s a problem

Seeing you perform
Makes me dream again
While actually listening
Crushes them

Your talent amazes
Your voice so superior
I can’t crush this feeling
That I’m just too inferior

You are so talented
And close to my heart
Which is why right now
I’m watching myself fall apart

Fear

Heart pounding. Body shaking.
Fear of admitting fear.
Life changing. Heart aching.
Afraid of the future.
No contact. No assistance.
Brain shutting down.
Don’t tell. Don’t admit.
Living behind a wall.
People talk. Mouths move.
No sound in response.
Afraid to think. Afraid to feel.
Body turns numb.

Poem for my Mom

When I was a baby I held close to your side
As a toddler I was constantly in stride
As a young girl you were the center of my life
As a pre youth you were my savior when there was strife
When I reached 15, we had a brief break
When I was selfish and you weren’t really awake
But then in my later teenage years,
We grew closer and closer through laughter and tears
You became the one person who always knew how to mend
My heart, and you became my best friend.

On this day, so important, and so dear
I want you to understand what it would be like not having you here
You are the one person whose love I could never live without
You created, and are the center of what I am about
Living without you wouldn’t feel like life at all
Because I know you are the one person who will always catch me if I fall
If you were gone my life would be broken
Everything would be left unspoken
My heart would be locked up tight
With no one there, I would lose the fight
That is constantly going on in my head
Saying that everything should be left unsaid
My mind says to hold everything in
But you always look and see what’s within
You make me talk and you know what I’ll say
Mostly just hugging you makes the pain go away

I live and I love and I’m here because of you
I talk because I listened to you
I love because you taught me how to
I laugh because I see the joy it brings you
I believe because you showed me God is true
I followed your example and I grew
Spiritually and physically because of you
The thing is, I know I will never be alone
Your love has always been with me as I’ve grown
And I know that this will never change,
Even when we are thousands of miles away
You’ll still be inside my heart
And in this way, we will never be apart

Fighting With My Best Friend

She is my best friend,
My love for her has no end
On my soul she has placed her seal
And yet she is also my Achilles heel

Her anger stops my heart
Her frustration tears me apart
Every time she lashes out
My entire being reels with doubt

I hate and love her at the same time
I rarely know the depth of my crime
I cry and wait until she forgives
Because without her there is no reason to live

Rarely in my life has she said sorry
Seeing that she was the one at folly
Usually waiting for justification
She won’t listen to my explanation

So instead of arguing I sit in anticipation
And hope she’ll forget the entire situation
Most of the time my lips stay sealed
And none of my crimes are ever appealed

Nobody

I’m nobody
I’m gullible and naïve
I’m a filler friend never a true friend
I’m the other friend, never the best friend
I’m the person to ignore until your friends aren’t around
I’m the person who talks to you when you’re sad
But never the person you call when you’re happy
I’m promised things all the time,
But never given anything, not even a phone call
I’m constantly here for everyone else
But no one is ever here for me
I’m part of the group if I’m there,
But I’m never invited
I’m only part of the group because my existence isn’t realized
I’m always second best, if even that
I’m never a first thought
I’m the one to blame, the one to make fun of, and the one to ignore
I’m the one to forget, the one to ditch, and the one to lie to
I’m not the person to invite to a party
I’m not the person to call up just to talk
I’m not the person to be best friends with
And I’m definitely not the person to fall in love with
I’m the filler friend when you’re lonely
But you’re never my friend when I’m lonely
I’m always lonely because I’m always alone
I’m gullible and naïve
I’m nobody

My Eyes

My eyes show what I cannot
But only to those who look
My tone tells what my words cannot
But only to those who listen
I don’t know how to be straight forward
I don’t know how to tell the truth
I never lie, but I also don’t talk
The things I feel are under a tight lock
If you want to know me, you have to try
You have to prove you truly care
My trust has been broken too many times
For me to just put my heart on the line.

Ripples

She stepped in the water
The ripples spread
She looked at me with a smile
And this is what she said:

Every action we make is a ripple
I smile at you, you smile at him,
He smiles at her, so she doesn’t kill herself tonight
Smile often, laugh a lot, love everyone and always remember
Every action we make is a ripple

She stepped in the water than pulled her foot back
Deciding she wanted to make a different impact
She didn’t want ripples, she wanted waves
So she threw her whole body in with a smile on her face

Every action we make is a ripple
I smile at you, you smile at him,
He smiles at her, so she doesn’t kill herself tonight
Smile often, laugh a lot, love everyone and always remember
Every action we make is a ripple