The Light of the Kingdom

Make me a beacon of ever-flowing light

A bird enamored by the gifts of flight

A minaret wafting songs of joy and delight

A haven of love in the darksome night

Purify my heart from all worldly things

From the dust which sullies my mortal wings 

From self-focused thought and the torment it brings

From this world to which my ego clings

Let the Light of the Kingdom radiate through me

Its reflection illuminated in the depths of the sea

Its glorious message setting hearts and souls free

As each of us strives in His Light just to 'Be' 

"Let the love and light of the Kingdom radiate through you, until all who look upon you shall be illumined by its reflection."

A Jasmine Blossom

The sweet perfume of thy petals

Will accompany me this day

Invigorating my soul

Strengthening and guiding my way

Given by the loving hand

Of a pure and radiant heart

A reminder of His constant grace

This living work of art

Your intoxicating fragrance

In an instant transports me

To the pivot of my essence

The threshold of His Mercy

Your fragile, delicate blossom

Will slowly wilt and die

But the glory of your fragrance

Is beyond the mortal eye

Gratitude With Every Breath

It takes challenges to recognize success

It takes experiencing illness to truly value health

It takes struggle to find and appreciate peace

It takes poverty to understand the responsibilities of wealth

When I can't breathe, when I can't see, when I have no energy

I pray to God for insight, for strength and my heart lifts

For I realize that a life without tests would defeat the purpose of living

And I am grateful for the tests, for the challenges, for the struggles, for they are all gifts

Listening for Wisdom

There is a calm reverence found in quiet reflection

Moments caught, captured, cherished

The gentle rhythm of air filling and exiting the lungs

Listening for God's confirmation

For wisdom's manifestation

When it comes, it is a whisper of insight

A soft urging, a tender knowing within our hearts

If we are patient, quiet, open, we will hear

We will pull into reality a tiny spark

A gentle glow in the dark

If we take this tiny epiphany and let it grow

Feeding it with contemplation and meditation

Until it is manifested in change, learning, action 

We will find that we have the tools to face any test

We will find that we are truly and utterly blessed

Photo taken by my dad (Kevin Trick). 

A Fire Within My Soul

This fire that burns within my soul

Cannot be smothered or quenched

It is the essence of my love for You

Deeply and firmly entrenched

I would sooner give up breathing

Than deny it's existence or block it's light

For without it's presence my life would be 

As directionless as wandering in the dark of night

It is the sun that gives me purpose and life 

My freedom, my comfort, my companion, my goal

Until each of us recognizes this blessed connection

We will never feel completely and peacefully whole

(picture taken by Kevin Trick)

Little One

A peace I haven't felt in years

Wafts over me as I sit here with you

All tension and worry disappears

And a quiet calm seeps through

The birds outside sing of the joys of God's grace

As in my arms you drift in gentle sleep

A smile softly flickers across your little face 

Oh my precious one, slumber deep

Dream of the world you will help to create

Of the brilliance your generation will bring to this earth

A world where love always conquers hate

And the beauty of your soul is what defines your worth

With your little hand wrapped around my finger

I yearn for our world to mature and transform

Into a place where purity and innocence linger

And trust and compassion are our culture's norm

The light you have brought, with your giggles and smiles

Has illumined our lives like the sun

Though your path may be filled with beautiful trials

You will never walk alone, my little one

Connection

Little by little I became a shadow
My essence unmanifested, my heart's comfort out of reach
Grasping for an anchor in this world
A connection from which Your love to beseech

But no matter how I struggled and searched
My efforts felt in vain, my quest incomplete
And as my joy and light slipped out of my grasp
I lost sight of the concrete

But with one glimpse of a mountain of snow
One raven's call, one forest's glory
I found that connection once again
The physical bindings to my soul's eternal story

A Martyr's Gift

27 years ago today, on June 10th, 1986, the day that I was born, a man named Farid Bihmardi was martyred in Iran. He was imprisoned for 22 months, 9 of which were spent in solitary confinement, he was not allowed access to his family or friends, was tortured, kept in horrible conditions and brutally murdered simply because he was a member of the Baha'i Faith and was serving at the time on a body of nine individuals charged with keeping track of the administrative affairs of the community of believers in Iran. 

His martyrdom though an immensely important event in my own life, was not a singular occurrence, since the Iranian Revolution in 1979 the Baha'is of Iran have been intensely persecuted. There are currently over 100 Baha'is imprisoned in Iran, some because they were striving to provide education to the Baha'i Youth in Iran who are being systematically kept from obtaining university degrees, some because of their efforts to be a part of the social transformation of their communities, and seven individuals for doing exactly the same thing that Farid was martyred for - for administering the social and religious affairs of the Baha'i Community in Iran. 

These seven individuals were imprisoned five years ago and two years later were sentenced to 20 years imprisonment. The longest sentence of any prisoners of conscience currently held in Iranian prisons. 

I am inspired by their strength and perseverance, and I pray with all my heart that their trials and tribulations be lifted soon. And I pray that they know that their sacrifices have not been for nothing, that their strength and courage have inspired millions of people around the world, of which I am just one. 

I wrote the following song to honor a man, whom I have never met, a man who brought joy and radiance to his fellow prisoners, who was a light and a beacon of love and Faith to all who met him. A man who has impacted my life in ways far beyond the range that my small song can express. 

A Martyr’s Gift

[verse 1]

As a baby I was taken to His shrine

On the threshold I was lain as a silent prayer

A prayer that His protection would be mine

That His guidance and love would always be there

And it has been all through my life

For you have always been with me

A calming strength in times of strife

A guide and friend endlessly

[chorus 1]

O Farid, O Farid

Your selflessness and grace

Has brought me to this place

You’ve been my light in the darkest night

My eyes when I had lost my sight

You gave me strength to do what was right

With the love you released as your soul took flight

[verse 2]

Walking down the path tonight

You take each step as I do

All that has passed and all that might

Has been and will be done for you

As your joyous soul was set free

On that radiant and blessed morn

It forever connected you and me

For that was the day that I was born

[chorus 2]

O Farid, O Farid

Your selflessness and grace

Has brought me to this place

You’ve been my light in the darkest night

My eyes when I had lost my sight

You gave me strength to do what was right

For I was born as your soul took flight

[bridge]

Taken before your time was through

For His Cause you lived and died

My life and death I give to you

O Martyr, watching from on High

[chorus 2]

Here are a few links in relation to the persecution of Baha'is in Iran and specifically in relation to Farid Bihmardi:

http://www.iranpresswatch.org/

http://www.iranhrdc.org/english/publications/reports/3149-a-faith-denied-the-persecution-of-the-baha-is-of-iran.html?p=29#.UbJXkPaY__Q

http://foadmanshadi.wordpress.com/category/bahai-human-rights-news/page/2/

Thank you to Sepher Fanaeian for playing the flute in the song.

All the pictures in the video are mine, except for the two with captions which are from the Baha'i World News Service website (http://news.bahai.org/human-rights/iran/iran-update/) and the last one (http://www.iranrights.org/english/memorial-case-15312.php).

Reflections

I feel like I've been lacking in creative inspiration

My mind and heart avoiding one another

My pen and fingers silenced by fear

Fear of what my heart and mind might say

Were they to meet

Right now I am drifting on a raft of separation

Holding my breath and trying not to make too many ripples

In the lives of others or myself

Not asking for anything, but wishing I could

Yearning to matter

I miss the comfort and sense of love that come

From living with a family

People to care for, to protect and cherish

A constant and continuous union of love and joy

Where all feel needed

Where the past and present meet is a rich sum

Of beauty and faith, light and joy

Where loss turns to growth and we continue to progress

Moving forward along a path

Known to all and yet none

Crisis and victory often shape my existence

As I walk a path unknown

Sometimes lonely and disappointed

Trying to be detached and to trust that if I put my faith in God

All will become clear eventually

Everyday I pray for Divine assistance

To let go of my sorrows and limitations

And I take comfort in the fact that as I struggle and learn

I draw closer to Him

And mature into the person He created me to be

This Friend's Greatest Wish

Our many long and deep conversations 

Of love and marriage, friendship and movement

Of joyous hopes and lost frustrations

Fill my mind with sweet amusement

To see you sitting in utter joy

Your walls gone, no longer needed

Giggling and gushing of an amazing boy

The love on your face unimpeded

The light that filled your eyes that day

Said all I could ever need to know

Your love a burning, glorious ray

That set your heart and soul aglow

I can't express the transformation

I've seen these last few months in you

But I can say without an ounce of hesitation

That the love you share is Divine and true

I've watched your faces, your hearts ignite

Each time that your eyes meet

And I've learned I'll tempt forever's spite

In search of a love as gloriously sweet 

A Door Unlocked

What waits for me there,

In the land of longing and glory?

An answer to my questions?

The continuation of my story?

Why have I been blinded for so long,

To the truth of my love for you?

You have called to me for eleven years

And my heart yearned for your view

My essence answered your call,

But I thought you were out of my reach

Gone forever from my life

Beyond any gift my prayers could beseech

Now I look back in wonder

At the door I thought was locked

And can’t wait for the day

When my footsteps again fall where once they walked

Home

Written 2 September 2012

My heart, as all others, was made for You
Your dwelling place, Your home
Unknowingly I gave it to the world
And left Your gift to roam

Now I yearn with every atom
Every element of my soul
To clear out the strangers living within it
And unquestioningly make Your light my goal

Written 8 January 2013

I've found home within myself
A quiet place where I am sure of my own truth
Where I can safely stop and think
And try to understand this world through my own eyes
This place is Your home for You built it within me
I am Your guest and You are my only Friend and Desire


O SON OF BEING! Thy heart is My home; sanctify it for My descent. Thy spirit is My place of revelation; cleanse it for My manifestation.

O SON OF SPIRIT! The best beloved of all things in My sight is Justice; turn not away therefrom if thou desirest Me, and neglect it not that I may confide in thee. By its aid thou shalt see with thine own eyes and not through the eyes of others, and shalt know of thine own knowledge and not through the knowledge of thy neighbor. Ponder this in thy heart; how it behooveth thee to be. Verily justice is My gift to thee and the sign of My loving-kindness. Set it then before thine eyes.

Kindred Spirits

Sitting on your shoulders
I have never felt so tall
The world before my eyes
Knowing you'll catch me if I fall

My heart alight with joy
As we watched the world unfurl
Kindred spirits, you and I
A daddy and his little girl

You'd read to me at bedtime
Stories of beauty and of wonder
Tales of courage and purity
And a lesson in every blunder

I'd fall asleep too quickly
To catch all the words you'd share
But you'd ask me what I last remembered
And we'd always start again from there

When my mind was filled with worry
And I tossed and turned all night
When sickness kept me awake
You were my soul's comforting sight

You would chase away my fear
You, your book and the light in the hall
Every nightmare conquered
And into gentle sleep I would fall

Still to this day when my mind races
I close my eyes and can see you there
A beacon of strength in the darkness
Challenging my fears to appear if they dare

This is who you are to me
You've lifted me high as the sky
Been my protector, my warmth, my light
And taught me to love, to dream and to fly


Happy Birthday, I love you Daddy.

Fighting with the Wind

A bird flies on the wings of time, 

high in the skies above

Feathers strain to maintain their rhyme, 

as in vain he fights for his love

But what of the call of the wind's harsh might, 

as he is hauled in the thralls of its grip

Pulled away from his goal as day becomes night, 

a toll he will pay for this trip

Each second ignites the wind's burning wrath, 

as it delights in his sight's blurring vision

In a daze he's pulled sideways off of the path, 

his gaze had always envisioned 

As his strength declines he refines and amends, 

the signs he has been handed

What if the shore he swore to defend,

was the war that was keeping him stranded?

Surrendering his goal he gives over control, 

and his whole being is stilled

For infinite possibility lies with a soul,

that flies in the skies of God's Will

Longing for Beauty and Innocence

(a pantoum)

This longing lives deep within me

Trees of green and nature's glory

For a place I once felt safe and free

For northern lights and endless stories

Trees of green and nature's glory

Explored through childhood's purity

For northern lights and endless stories

Paint pictures of joy and security

Explored through childhood's purity

The magic and wonder of life

Paint pictures of joy and security 

Free from all pain and strife

The magic and wonder of life

As lovely as the rain in the sky

Free from all pain and strife

Soaring as high as an eagle can fly

As lovely as the rain in the sky

This love in my heart still holds true

Soaring as high as an eagle can fly

Alaska, I pray once again to greet you

This love in my heart still holds true

For a place I once felt  safe and free

Alaska, I pray once again to greet you

This longing lives deep within me

Light and Shadows

Why do you weep?
In darkness alone. 
Silence your only friend
In a graveyard of stone. 

Why do you hide?
With these ghosts of bygone times 
And climb into the graves
Of self-inflicted crimes

Why do you yearn? 
For the dawn's first brilliant rays
Yet walk alone in blindness
In the clutches of night's maze

Why do you dream?
Of a life you hold at bay
Haunted by the choices
And scars you won't betray

If you look into the shadows
Tween the sun, the earth and moon
You'll find no respite from the wails
Of time's eternal tune

So learn to walk towards the light
Past the gates of endless fear
And you'll find hearts waiting for you
To invite them to draw near

A Legacy of Love

Two hearts who put their faith in God
When they went to that threshold to pray
Built a legacy of love filled with joy and light
Which I honor with wonder today
Founded upon a certainty
That they were meant to be with one another
They joined hands and hearts thirty years ago this day
And later became my father and mother

A fleeting moment was their time on this mountain
Yet those precious years are the essence of our story
For their love was created and added to twice
In the shadows of His ancient and radiant Glory
Their service and sacrifice were a beacon in our lives
A foundation on which we learn and grow
And my heart overflows as I stand here today
Where our journey began thirty years ago

The Search for Purpose and Reason

Rain doesn't fall, it pours

From my eyes into emptiness

Broken only by confusion's obstacles

Softened only by the silent echoes

Of a heart's fearful release 

There is no peaceful departure

No calm after the storm

It comes and it goes as a lighthouse beacon

But instead of exuding safety

It bleeds uncertainty and despair

My body grows weak, heavy

Its senses obscured by loss

Loss of emotion, loss of its life force

Loss of stability, loss of clarity

And so, hollowness finds a home

Empty and lonely, my heart searches

For the light of purpose and reason,

It asks the same question over and over

Are You here guiding me?

Holding my hand as I weep?

Will sunshine come again?

Questions, filled with doubt

Lost in "someday's" endless maze

The present weighs on my heart

And I sit in confused silence

The Connection of Hearts

My heart pours over in its love for you

Far greater than comprehension can master

A joyous light dancing within its memory

Even as time moves ever faster

A world apart, yet in a single moment

The connection of hearts defeats reason

A tiny message enraptures my soul

Its love unbound to a place or a season

With you, my love, I will always be

For our souls are not bound to this earthly existence

Your light will forever exist in my heart

A gift I feel no matter the distance

A New Vision

A day is lost as the night is found
A safety left when new cries resound
Each journey must finish before a new one can start
Each life must end to meet the Beloved of its heart

With each lost hope and broken dream
With every anguished cry and silent scream
A path is illumined, a purpose one can glean
A new door opens,  a meaning can be seen

Every confused thought, every seeming rift
Every misfortune is a blessing and gift
We must learn to look deeper at the darknesses we face
And we will see that they are truly illumined by His grace

Remoteness

A longing lives within every human being

The foundation of the great masterpiece which is our transcendent soul

A yearning for purpose, for attachment, for meaning

For a light to diffuse the darkness within us, to make us feel whole

And so we search for an answer to quench our thirst

A remedy for the ceaseless hunger we feel within our hearts

In the depths of material existence we become submersed

Falling victim to earthly happiness and fleeting passion's darts

Remoteness consumes every heart and mind

Feeding our confusion with its anguish, its fire

In its terrible heat we become blind 

Attaching our hearts to everything but their truest desire

Yet the want we feel within us is not numbed 

By the deception and distraction we use to silence it's cries 

For within our veins it's question has always drummed

Searching for a light it knows is there, no matter how we veil our eyes

The answer to its query is within our convictions

It lives within each of us, closer than our breath, our limb

For the remedy to all the world's afflictions

Is absolute trust, obedience and remembrance of Him

A Captain's Log

Lightning crashes

Within the confines of my mind

Reverberating through my body

Its electricity confined

Thunder screams

All nerves express their pain

The vibration of its echoes

Usher in the rain

Water gushes

In cascades of raging confusion

Or trickles of soft torment

A channel to seclusion

Storms rage on

Amassing hopes and fears

Silent destructive ravagers

Lasting moments or years

Realization wafts

As temperatures begin to warm

That we are each the captains

Of our own internal storms

A Broken Winged Bird

We are often like birds
Who do not recognize their own wings
Stuck wandering the material world

Unaware that within us
Lies the capacity to fly
To soar above the confusion and nearsightedness
Which define life on the ground

We instead sully our wings
With attachment to earthly things
With criticism and hopelessness
Guilt, fear and blame


We busy ourselves in the lives of others
As a way of distracting ourselves
From what we think we lack
From what we believe we are incapable of doing

As a way of distracting ourselves
From the vast, impenetrable distance
Which we perceive between us and His light

But this distance we perceive
Is our greatest vain imagining
Our ego's strongest battalion

For it keeps us blind to the gifts
Which are latent within us
Gifts which have graciously and generously
Been bestowed upon us

Blind to our creativity, to our strengths
To our own inner nobility, our connection to God
Our wings

Our purpose on this earth
Is to break free of the shackles of self
Which hold us down and deceive us
To embrace the possibility 
That we can do things which we do not feel capable of doing

For only when we embrace this truth

The truth that we are inherently noble and celestial
That our hearts were created
To soar in the heaven of remembrance of Him
Guided only by the breezes of His Will

And the Day Star of His love


Will we truly embrace His Light within us
And learn to fly

"Say: Deliver your souls, O people, from the bondage of self, and purify them from all attachment to anything besides Me. Remembrance of Me cleanseth all things from defilement, could ye but perceive it." - Baha'u'llah

Abasement and Nobility

Neither of these poems have a title, but the first one reminds me of the beginning of a prayer by Baha'u'llah which says "O Son of Spirit! Noble have I created thee, yet thou has abased thyself." And the second poem, reminds me of the second half of that prayer "Rise then unto that for which thou was created." 

(Poem 1)

A flower grows, blossoms

Shares its fragrance with the world

And then dies

Its purpose, to touch hearts

To share its beauty and nobility

In its short life

It takes its glory, its purpose

From the radiant sun 

Its life force

But what if that flower, were unable

To see or recognize

Its own light

What if it could see, the love 

The joy on the faces of the people

Who saw it

But it couldn't comprehend, understand

What they were seeing or feeling,

Their love

Its perspective, veiled by its blindness

The gift it was to the world

Unrecognized

Only emptiness, did it feel

Ashamed at what it wasn't

What it couldn't see

How does one, teach a candle

To recognize its flame

Its grandeur

A flower, to smell its perfume

Its glory

Or a blind man, to open his eyes

And see

(Poem 2)

What I see every day

All things that I do

Everything in this world

Gains its existence from You

I can push myself down

I can see myself as small

But Your glory lives inside me

Standing strong, bright and tall

The silent resistance 

Of self criticism and fear

Only serve to hold me back

And keep me from drawing near

No matter how small I feel

Or how little I think I deserve to fly

The capacity and responsibility live within me

And in the depths of my soul there is no I

So please tell me who I am

Let me read Your words as true

For my inner beauty and reality

Are only known through You

A Mermaid Child

A precious child

Born to a king

Loved and cherished

The most blessed gift

To hear her sing

Her soul spoke to you

The angels could be heard

This gem within her

Manifested itself

In the Glory of His Word

But the world ensnared her

Trapped her with its sights

For envy and attachment

She gave up her soul

For worldly and material delights

She gained happiness for a moment

But the veils of ego’s view

Blinded her to the truth

And she forgot the beauty

Of the Light she had been born to

Imprisonment

I found my soul imprisoned today
Away from Your light and Your grace
My ego's good intentions
Wove shackles I hadn't traced

My mind often drifted in prayer
Joy slowly stopped intervening
As the light of compassion dimmed
My service lost much of its meaning

The insideous webs of blame
And judgement's encroaching presence
Forced all meaning from my pain
All growth drained out of its essence

But now that I've found it again
I pray for Your aid and assistance
To build a new prison with walls and guards
Against my ego's insistence

Set free my glorious soul
Let it fly on the wings of Your love
And never again let it fall victim
To the dross which saddened Noah's dove

An Instrument of Beauty

Oh the joy you bring to my life
My beautiful six stringed friend
Connection at my fingertips
My heart and soul transcend

You sat silent most my life
Few fingers to express
The capacity within you
The beauty you possess

But now you are my voice
My solace and my guide
Your companionship a treasure
I pray I never set aside

Caressing your gentle strings
My heart is happy and whole
You weave my inner melody
Strumming the music of my soul

Exhaustion

Exhaustion weighs down my body
Silences my brain
Veils my soul's yearnings
Everything mundane

My hands begin to shake
Response, beyond my reach
Lost in confusion's loops
Your help do I beseech

Praying fervently
I yearn for confirmation
A light to lead me forward
Towards the winds of maturation

I lay my life within Your grasp
And pray for a change in attitude
New perspective and direction
Then I bow my head in gratitude

The Mystery of Time

Time slips by
Sand quietly falling
Breaths and memories
Lost to nature's calling

A day feels like a year
Yet a year feels like a day
Endless moment's of anguish
To time's wealth, fall pray

Lost in a single moment
Battered by a storm
In retrospect a gift
When finally you transform

The soother of most ills
A path to detachment and calm
In harmony with remembrance of God
Time is the greatest healing balm

A Prayer for Trust and Release

Tonight I fail at optimism
I sleep with dreams confused
Chaos reigns within my mind
My heart is much abused

I am my own greatest test
My thoughts are black with blame
No compassion do I feel
For this girl who holds my name

Discomfort and pressure
Have been my life for far too long
Overwhelmed I've wandered lost
Deaf to my own song

I know this weight I seem to carry
Is of my own creation
But please help me lay it in Your hands
And end this eternal stagnation

The City of Certitude

Our soul's deepest longing
As days flow quickly past
Is to achieve our heart's desire
For this existence will not last

With sincerity we search
Our devotion never ending
For a meaning to this life
Never truly comprehending

That its meaning is with God
In a City we must find
Closer than our life vein
Though our ego keeps us blind

We must cleanse the channels of our souls
Offering our lives in servitude
Sincere and focused on naught but God
Until we find the gate to the City of Certitude

The Webs of My Mind

Emotion sits high in my throat
Caught between speech and suppression
Tension builds within my being
Begging for expression

I yearn to be free of it all
To let go the confusion and fear
Detached from all save You
Existence resplendent and clear

But the webs keep pulling me back
Entrapping me with their deception
Making me question my soul's foundation
Doubting and veiling my own reflection

My light is stifled a little each day
As I wander in the maze of my mind
Praying You'll guide and protect me
And lead me to whatever You wish me to find

A Choice of Love

Life is a path we walk
With each step we choose the direction
Does the ego lead us forward
Or is our goal our soul's perfection?

Do we expect excellence in this moment
And give up when it's not achieved?
Or do we look for the capacity within us
And pursue excellence in all we've received?

We are capable of so much more
When we put our fears and faults aside
Trusting in the light of God within us
A nobility our egos wish to hide

These gems we possess are not only a treasure
But a responsibility we hold
To develop and cultivate these gifts of His love
And shine them bright for all to behold

Burst Thy Cage Asunder

A bud, brimming with potential

Has no purpose in life but to bloom

Were it to hide forever, safe within itself

Existence would morn its unsmelled perfume

Though to bloom is to give in to fragility 

Accepting broken petals and the sacrifice of self

Each flower that blooms is a gift from His hand

A sign of His love, its inherent wealth

A seed, the foundation of existence

Holds within its core a cherished treasure

But to share its legacy with the world

It must sacrifice what no tongue can measure

Though to grow is to break apart its earthly home

To accept the interdependency of all living things

Its sacrifice links its heart to the Light

And provides it with earthly and heavenly wings

Do we steal from the world our soul's precious gift

Shielding ourselves from anguish and pain

Neither giving nor receiving love or support

Afraid that to change means to drown in the rain?

Like a brimming bud and a shining seed

Each day this choice is ours to make

Do we hide in the dark, safe and alone

Or accept that to grow means at times we will break